Top 10 Jokes For a Thursday

Bored on a Thursday night..... Ya that's me.. hahahaha

Went searching.. Found a few good jokes... Sharing with you all.... I Sharing~~~~

At number!!!!! ... So do I start with 1 or 10?

10.) A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all!"

For all those who don't speak dog.. by adding another woof it would totally mean another thing... Don't ask me how I know... I'm a wolf remember? It kinda works the same way like braille 1 extra dash or dot.. can totally mean something different.

9.) A guy walks into a bar with a dog. He claims the dog can talk. "Give me a beer and I'll show you." The bartender slides a beer to him and the man asks the dog, "Fido, what is that above our heads?" The dog says, "Roof!" The irritated bartender says, "That's not talking, he sounds like any other dog." The man says, "OK, how about this - Fido, who was the best baseball player of all time?" The dog says, "Ruth!" The bartender throws the man and the dog out of the bar. Fido says to the man, "Ya think I shouldda said DiMaggio?"

I have no idea why am I reading dog jokes this evening.......  Let's just move on... TO NUMBER 8!!

8.) A magician walks down an alley and turns into a bar.

For those who don't get this... It's called... ~MAGIC~~

7.) A distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?" "Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just the remote 'thingy'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries as it's a long walk.

Sometimes we just get too far ahead with technology to look back at simple basic things we.... used to know

6.) From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm bored!" Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!" Unknown aircraft: "I said I was bored, not stupid!"

Don't we all just love english...?

5.) A man goes into a bar with a giraffe, they both get a couple of rounds in. When they get up to leave they're extremely drunk and the giraffe passes out and falls over. The man opens the door, about to leave by himself, when the bartender stops him suddenly and says, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" The man turns around and slurs, "Don't be silly, that's not a lion, that's a giraffe!"

urm.... same as above? the comments I mean

4.)  A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"

Ain't this just so funny?

3.) Celine Dion walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"

I bet joke number 4 seems awfully funny now

2.) A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "Hey buddy, can't you read that sign? It says no dogs allowed! Get that mutt out of here!" The man replies, "No, I can't read the sign - I'm blind, and this is my seeing eye dog." The bartender is embarrassed and gives the man a beer on the house. Later that day, the guy is telling his friend about it: "I told him I was blind and I got a free beer!" The friend then takes his dog into the bar and sits down, and the bartender says, "The sign says no dogs allowed! You'll have to leave!" The friend says, "Sorry, I can't see the sign because I'm blind, and this is my seeing eye dog." The bartender replies, "Since when do they give out Chihuahuas as seeing eye dogs?" The man says, "They gave me a Chihuahua?" 

Ah...... Should this be the numeber 1 joke?? Damn I can't decide.... And NOW!!! For THE NUMBER 1 JOKE!!!!!!!

1.)A giraffe walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" (This joke never gets old) 

Gotcha!

Cheers all!! Now back to my assignments ... Arrrrr so much work...

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P.S, If it's possible to spend a few of your seconds~ To take the poll? Please do~ Thank you.