WTF Is Wrong With Me?!?!?!

"Nope, It's Your Blood Type"

Saturday!! The weather seems nice! You guys need to be out there!!!!!!!

Here's the list to all the Blood Jokes we currently have! More to come though! 

Top 10 Jokes For a Thursday

Bored on a Thursday night..... Ya that's me.. hahahaha

Went searching.. Found a few good jokes... Sharing with you all.... I Sharing~~~~

At number!!!!! ... So do I start with 1 or 10?

10.) A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all!"

For all those who don't speak dog.. by adding another woof it would totally mean another thing... Don't ask me how I know... I'm a wolf remember? It kinda works the same way like braille 1 extra dash or dot.. can totally mean something different.

9.) A guy walks into a bar with a dog. He claims the dog can talk. "Give me a beer and I'll show you." The bartender slides a beer to him and the man asks the dog, "Fido, what is that above our heads?" The dog says, "Roof!" The irritated bartender says, "That's not talking, he sounds like any other dog." The man says, "OK, how about this - Fido, who was the best baseball player of all time?" The dog says, "Ruth!" The bartender throws the man and the dog out of the bar. Fido says to the man, "Ya think I shouldda said DiMaggio?"

I have no idea why am I reading dog jokes this evening.......  Let's just move on... TO NUMBER 8!!

8.) A magician walks down an alley and turns into a bar.

For those who don't get this... It's called... ~MAGIC~~

7.) A distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?" "Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just the remote 'thingy'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries as it's a long walk.

Sometimes we just get too far ahead with technology to look back at simple basic things we.... used to know

6.) From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm bored!" Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!" Unknown aircraft: "I said I was bored, not stupid!"

Don't we all just love english...?

5.) A man goes into a bar with a giraffe, they both get a couple of rounds in. When they get up to leave they're extremely drunk and the giraffe passes out and falls over. The man opens the door, about to leave by himself, when the bartender stops him suddenly and says, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" The man turns around and slurs, "Don't be silly, that's not a lion, that's a giraffe!"

urm.... same as above? the comments I mean

4.)  A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"

Ain't this just so funny?

3.) Celine Dion walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"

I bet joke number 4 seems awfully funny now

2.) A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "Hey buddy, can't you read that sign? It says no dogs allowed! Get that mutt out of here!" The man replies, "No, I can't read the sign - I'm blind, and this is my seeing eye dog." The bartender is embarrassed and gives the man a beer on the house. Later that day, the guy is telling his friend about it: "I told him I was blind and I got a free beer!" The friend then takes his dog into the bar and sits down, and the bartender says, "The sign says no dogs allowed! You'll have to leave!" The friend says, "Sorry, I can't see the sign because I'm blind, and this is my seeing eye dog." The bartender replies, "Since when do they give out Chihuahuas as seeing eye dogs?" The man says, "They gave me a Chihuahua?" 

Ah...... Should this be the numeber 1 joke?? Damn I can't decide.... And NOW!!! For THE NUMBER 1 JOKE!!!!!!!

1.)A giraffe walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" (This joke never gets old) 

Gotcha!

Cheers all!! Now back to my assignments ... Arrrrr so much work...

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P.S, If it's possible to spend a few of your seconds~ To take the poll? Please do~ Thank you.

Greatest Inventions or Discoveries

When we talk about inventions... What do you think about?..
Let's not talk about phones, or handphones.. or the World Wide Web... Let's not even mention the creators of World Of Warcraft... Let's move.... slightly further back... Somewhere when they discovered fire... or the wheel...

Personally... I hate the discovery of the wheel... The invention of the round round thing that makes our live so convenient...

Have anybody ever gave it some thought? The wheel... Is actually the beginning of the "Fat Evolution" I believe the wheel was actually discovered by 1 fat cave man or something...
"Hey I'm fat! Look at me roll!! WoOooo Round thing roll!!!"

Well without the wheel... We all might be tall muscular Apes Dragging our stuffs here and there... It all just takes 1 fat lazy ape.... To make things so simple...... and.... drag every other ape to the "fat side"

Now you might be thinking.. Hey it's just wheels, no big of a deal... It's truly the biggest convenience for all of us.. Now Now Now! Let me give you an example..... Donuts...... ya donuts..... Fattening food.... that resembles the wheel.... What about burgers?!...... I believe squarish sandwiches won't make you fat... What else... Let's see... hmmmm PIZZAs......... Without WHEELS I don't think they even have WHEELS of Cheese..... so there won't be fattening cheesy pizzass!!...

.................. So why am I ranting about round stuffs?........ Well I slip and fell down a staircase just Yesterday... Rainy day.. blah blah blah..... Went down with an ommph!... Hurt my back... zzzz
Could be worse... Lucky the fats were there to cushion the fall.......
........ Hmmm that still ain't quite related to wheels.........

NOW I WANNA COMPLAIN BOUT FRICTION!!!!!

Why I Ain't Rich?????

Who doesn't dream of being a millionaire? Maybe nowadays its more of a billionaire dream.. Million doesn't seem to quite make it anymore.

The dream of money.....

I personally have read a few books... You know, those books titled "How to be a millionaire" or "Habits of a Millionaire"... Ya basically it's books with a "how to" and always ending with a Millionaire behind its title.

I guess with people like me buying those books.. Then the authors truly become a millionaire...

Anyways..... I find something common in these books... The always highlight on... SPEND LESS.... SAVE MORE....

Yup... these 2 statements always appear almost everywhere... Do not spend on unnecessary stuffs. Save on what you can save..

Well.............. I thought of giving it a try.... I spend less and less..... I eat less.... I drink less... I even spend lesser on transport... walking here and there

Well ... I've been doing that for almost a year now.... And................Now I look into my bank account....
I couldn't even see... more then 3 zeros behind any digit...... I ain't even 1/2 way there to a million..... not even a 1/4...... -.- So where did I go wrong?!??!

I went to ask my brother about it..... And here's what he told me...

My Biggest Fan

There I was walking around Plaza Singapura in a very very slow mo pace.
Friends always complain bout me walking that slow... You know that kind of slow where the assassin will pop in the window with 2 guns, shooting left and right... Yeah that kind of slow mo... Well ain't that slow.. But I'm just a slow walker.

It was damn crowded... People going in, going out... Well you know the procedure....

So there I was walking outside... Am just passing by Plaza Singapura actually....
Suddenly... I really mean SUDDENLY!... I heard somebody shouted "Amenwolf!! Amenwolf!!"
Now I find it strange.... Usually people I know would have called me, either Amen or Wolf... But never Amenwolf....

I was looking around.... Trying to find that voice.. Wondering who could it be...
(End of Part 1.)

(Part 2.)
Before I continue on writing. Let's just say... It's hard to make a part 1 part 2 thingy on a blog... You'll never know where people will start reading from... Like for some of us... We always flip to the last page of the newspaper first.....Anyway... Enjoy... Part 2.

So.... I saw this guy quite a distance away from me.. Waving frantically... As he came towards me... breathless.....
"Amenwolf? You're Amenwolf aren't you?"
Okay.. I hate to admit it... At this point of time.. it was really noisy... Well it was crowded.. So I didn't quite catch... what he was saying here...
"Hi hi, I'm Albert." (or was it Robert............. I truly apologize for that....)
"I'm a big fan of yours!! Especially the comic strip thingy! Why you stopped doing it? It was so damn funny."

Right now.... In my mind was... wtf? How this guy knows me?......Then I noticed.. I was wearing the beanie -.-

So we had a little conversation, I told him I was kinda busy with life issues currently... (I guess you all could notice that... With the "LESS OFTEN" postings made...) ... (Or I am just lazy, either one)

Truly I'm amazed that someone is actually reading my blog... And..... even manage to "pick" me out in a place which is crowded.... And I always thought I blend in nicely with crowds....

Well I looked at him... He was slightly taller than me... Glasses.... Smart hair...... Can't quite remember was it a center parking or side.. hmmm....
So to end the conversation... I tried a daring move... It was a do or die thingy... It could either prolong this embarrassing moment or just cut it short.... I asked him a question...
"Do you smoke?"
My instinct was correct! He was too goody to be a smoker...... He rejected my offer.. And told me he was meeting some of his friends......
He wished me luck, and really wanted me to carry on with the comic strips...

I bade him farewell... And said thank you for his wishes... And hope he comes to visit my blog once in a while...

Truly... I'm amazed with the power of blogging... It can get quite scary... If you're not prepared.... Pictures are scary... especially if you do not want people to know who you are.......

So that's it... End of my "Biggest Fan" Post... Thank you all for reading...




P.S.
All of the above are fiction....
Cheers, it's April =)
Never too late to make a fool of anyone.